The Swan Diaries
by Jaspers Sex Kitten
Summary: Three years to the day since Edward left Bella, strange things are happening to her and she can't understand why? one of the Cullen's comes back. Does her blood still call to him or does something else bring him to her? Team Jasper story! Rated M! AU
1. Prologue

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full-length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them.**

**Prologue:**

In the days since they left, I had been under an enormous pressure to act normal. My heart was broken and I could not really function. I was an empty shell of my former self. How could I let them effect my life and not to mention Charlie's life like that. My poor father had to see me suffer everyday and there was not a damn thing neither he nor I could do about it.

Where would the road lead? What could I do to get myself back on track? It's just too damn hard to be alone. My friends tried talking to me but I just couldn't listen. Why try when the family that I loved, more than that, the ones I wanted to be with for all eternity, left me all alone.

I had shut down my heart, my soul and my will to survive. However, that all changed when Jasper came back into my life. I will remember the day for the rest of my life.

Three years to the day after Edward left me in the woods, or the incident as we now call it, I was at Newton's listening to Mike yammer on about meaningless shit. We were swamped and finally had a minute for a breather. I heard a husky southern voice from behind me.

"Bella?"

I turned and looked into his beautiful golden eyes, my world went dark. When my eyes reopened I was in my bedroom. At first I thought I had dreamed it again but then I heard him speak very quietly.

"Bella, darlin' are you okay?"

I sat straight up, my heart started to pound and the tears started to fall. I saw him from the corner of my eye move a step towards the bed and stop.

"Jasper, are you really here?" I cried out.

"Yes darlin' I am here, Alice sent me."

"No," I screamed, "it's just a dream, he can't be here... you left…. they left."

"Bella, I am...." I held up my hand to silence him. I jumped off the bed and ran for the bathroom. I made inside the door and slammed it behind me. Why was this happening to me? Why is he back? Shit! Are the others back? The room started to spin and I was in the darkness again.

When I was awakened by a cool set of hands on my face I was startled to be staring into his eyes again. I started to feel the tears stream down my cheeks again.

"Is that really you? Please tell me I am not dreaming anymore."

"Bella it is really me. You are not dreaming."

"Jasper, I am so tired will you stay until morning? Please don't leave me again."

As I drifted off I heard him say, "never again, I promise."

**Chapter Notes: This was just a small introduction there is more to come. If you love it/hate it, let me know hit the pretty green button :)**


	2. Chapter 1: A day in the Woods

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full-length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them.**

**Chapter 1 (A day in the woods)**

Dear Journal,

Today I think I have completely lost my noodle. I had the strangest dream last night. I have not had any dreams in months but this one was over the top. I am glad Charlie was not home. I can only imagine the things I said or screamed while I was sleeping. I just have to write it out maybe it will help make more sense.

I was walking in the woods enjoying the scenery. Like that would happen ever again. Thanks to Edward I can't go in the woods. I don't even like going outside. I'd rather just huddle up on my bed with a book and not have to worry about anyone or anything. Well anyways, it was a breezy, warm, sunny fall day. In the far off I could hear a hard hammering sound and decided to investigate.

I walked into a dense clearing and saw a very muscled man chopping a fallen tree. I notice him wearing very tight work pants, boots and nothing else. The sun's shinning down on him in a way that makes your heart stop. He's lightly sparkling with the few rays that are reaching out over his body. _I wish I knew what it would be like for him to touch me, kiss me and be inside me. _

I take a step forward out of the tree line as he turns and smile.

"Emmett?" I asked dumfounded.

"Hi Bells," he replied.

I was so struck by his beauty. I was standing there stiff as a board, like an idiot. I came back to reality.

"Emmett, why are you chopping that tree?" I asked stunned.

"Well baby I just wanted a change. I just didn't want to rip it up with my hands."

"Oh!"

I watched him walk towards me at human speed. My heart started to race and he smiled. His smile did things to my body that I can't even explain. He sent an electric current running thru me. The closer he got to me the hotter and wetter my panties were getting. I wanted him right here right now!

I know he felt my lust and desire for him. I watched as he grabbed me around the waist. Moving at vampire speed, he sat me on top of the tree he was working on.

He kissed me gently on the lips, jaw line and across my collarbone. I shuttered as a chill ran down my spine. Emmett slowly moves back up to my mouth and whispers….

"God, Bella, I can smell how much you want me. Can I have you, baby?"

"Yes, please Emmett."

His hands were down my sides and my shorts were pulled down before I finished my words. He leaned me back onto the tree and gently eases himself into me. I can feel my body forming to him. He feels so good inside of me.

I started grinding against his hips and he quickens his pace. He pulled my legs up to his shoulders and he enters a little deeper.

I can feel my stomach tighten and I am on the verge of the best orgasm of my life. He was taking unnecessary breaths as I am panting out his name with moans of pure ecstasy. We climax, yelling out each other's names as his hot sticky seed fills me.

There I am lying across this tree while he stands over me not moving, waiting for my breathing to turn to normal.

"Emmett, that...that was the.... best I've ever felt, thank you."

"My pleasure baby," he whispered into my ear as he helped me up and I get dressed.

I make my way back home and as I enter the front door I am suddenly sitting straight up in my bed. I am trying to figure out what in the hell just happened. I mean of all people... why Emmett? I feel there is something I am missing but I don't know what. Well time for work, so until tomorrow.

**Chapter Notes: **

**Umm, can you picture Em in that scene or what??? **

**If you love it/hate it, let me know hit the pretty green button :)**


	3. Chapter 2: Getting Dressed

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full-length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them.**

**Chapter 2 (Getting Dressed is not always Easy)**

Dear Journal,

Okay this is a very interesting dream I had last night. I still think I am loosing it. The more I try not to dream the worse they get. I am scared with all this pent up frustrations my dreams are causing I am literally going to explode.

I was getting ready for an evening out with Charlie and I was standing in my closet wearing no more than a pair of black lace panties and a matching bra and my cowboy boots. I had found my favorite pair of jeans and a Nickleback t-shirt to pull on.

I felt a cold pair of hands wrap around my waist. I jumped at the touch as he leaned down and whispered in my ear.

"Darlin, I want you now, please."

I went to speak to him and tried to turn to him but was held in a tight grip unable to move.

"Bella, I want you to bend over and grab your ankles. Can you do that for me?"

"Yes," I whispered knowing he'd hear me.

He slowly slid his hands down across my back. He gently presses his fingers across my hot, wet center. I am moaning as he presses his fingers in harder.

"God Bella, you are so wet for me."

A shot of electricity shot thru me. He ripped my panties off and gently entered me. My whole body twitched with the feel of him inside of me. I tried to straighten myself up once and he pushed me back down.

His pace was steady and firm but gentle. As I felt my body start to shutter with an orgasm I saw feet in front of me. I looked up into up and all the way, tight thighs and muscles.

"Emmett?" My voice was husky from the pleasure I was receiving from behind.

He looks down at me sheepishly.

"I want you to tease my cock and let me fuck your face," he growled out.

I nodded my head and reached up to stroke him while still being pounded from behind. I licked up the side of his erection and he whimpered.

If that isn't enough, he stands there letting out small growls as I take the tip of his manhood in my mouth and suck extremely hard. He arched his back and pushed into my mouth a little farther.

I can feel Jasper start to clench, as he slams into my core so hard that he rocks us forward with enough force to slide Emmett's manhood further into my mouth as he sprayed his seed into me. Emmett let out a fierce growl of pleasure. Jasper pulled out of me and got down between my legs and with his cold long hard tongue he licked my clit until I came.

I saw Jasper slide back against the wall and Emmett moved us to sit on the chair that's in the closet.

"Relax and don't move."

He gently pulled my legs up around his waist as he pushed himself into me. It was a very slow and wonderful feeling. His pace quickened and he threw me over the edge by pressing my clit between his thumb and index finger.

"Cum with me, baby," he growled out.

My body tightened as his did and my legs fell from his waist. As my feet hit the floor I fell out of my bed. I can't even dream without being clumsy.

Charlie came running into my room and threw on the light.

"What in the hell was that Bells?"

"Char-dad I am fine, I just fell out of the damn bed. Go back to bed please."

I was mortified. Wasn't it bad enough to have a dream about two of the vampires who abandoned you but then to fall out of your bed and have your father run in like you were a burglar? Oh this is going to be a bad day I can see that now. Until later.

**Chapter Notes: **

**LOL I know falling out or the bed was based off true events. You know we have all done it at least once. **

**Remember there is more to come. If you love it/hate it, let me know hit the pretty green button :)**


	4. Chapter 3: Morning Delight

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them.**

********You guys are freaking AWESOME!!! I had to post another chap after the morning I've had. I love the reviews and since 7am when I posted the first three entries 357 have viewed this story. YAY!!!!********

******Okay I have another story for you guys to check out. It is totally team Jasper and it is a trilogy.....Fate Has Brought Us Here, Love Will Keep Us There, & Hope Will Bring Us Home by Cullen 818 *** They are seriously awesome******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 3 (Morning Delight)**

Dear Journal,

The dreams I am having are getting stronger and more intense as the weeks go by. I know it's only been a few years since they left but I just don't understand what's happening. Last night was wild. I can't help but smile, even if I am beyond frustrated.

I woke up, stretched and turn my light on.

"What are you doing?" he asked with a sly grin on his beautiful face.

Jasper was on my bed. My bed! He was stretched out with his hands behind his head and smiling, completely naked, his left leg is slightly covered by the comforter.

"I am getting ready to go to work."

He smiled at me, pulled one arm from behind his head and turned his palm towards his face. He moved his finger back and forth to say come here. There is no way I could deny him anything. It was as if I was drawn to him.

I turned the light back off and got back in bed with him. He moved on top of me and kissed me. He moved his hand down my leg, grabbed my calf and lifted my leg over his shoulder.

"I will go slow but I.... must have you, now," he drawled out.

"Jasper, please!" (I apparently am not above begging!)

He slowly entered my hot center. My body reacted like I had been electrocuted. I felt a sensation of pure lust and love intertwined as he pounded into me until the muscles in me tightened and I was gasping for air as our bodies tightened together.

Looking down into my eyes, he gently kissed my lips and down my neck. He removed himself from me.

"Darlin' you better get up and get a move on if you don't want to be late for work."

I looked over at the clock and as I jumped up out of the bed I sat straight up in the bed. Wide eyed and breathing heavily.

Shit! Just thinking about it is making me crazy. I have to get a move on or I am going to be late so until later.

**Chapter Notes: Okay so I am anxious what did you think? Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know:) **


	5. Chapter 4: My body is EVIL

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL **

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them. **

****** You guys are awesome.... keep in mind as we go we are looking thru Bella to see her own thoughts and dreams. It's like her inner desires are coming out to play and she does'nt know why. Let's see where it goes, okay. ******

******Story rec for today are Control, One more taste and One final taste by Kitty Cullen-03. Team Jasper stories and they are absolutley fangtastic! LOL******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 4 (My body is Evil)**

Dear Journal,

The past weeks have been insane. Between work and school and now all of these dreams. I think am going crazy. Every hot guy I see makes my pants wet and my heart race.

_"Excuse me sir but I am a lonely, mentally disturbed girl. Would you like to feel me up?"_

Jesus really my body is evil. If I didn't know better I'd swear I was under some sort of spell. How fringing crazy is that shit? My whole world turns upside down and all I can do is have dirty dreams. What in the hell is wrong with me? This seriously can't be normal. Then again I have never claimed to be normal. Anyways off to work. Until later.　

Yay!!! A second entry, see journal I do have a life today. I had an awful day at school. Mike is driving me insane.

"Hey Bella want to go to the movies?"

"Do you want to go?"

Arg! No means no and stop fucking asking me. The boy just want get it.

"Hey Mike stupid much?"

"Yes Bella I am."

"Well asshat, I am not interested!"

I wonder if Charlie would arrest me for strangling him? Um, probably. Worth it? Not even. I'm too pretty for jail and I do not look good in orange or stripes!

I miss Jake. I don't like being alone. At least when I am with him or anyone I am better. I know he has a job to do but jeez I need a friend and unfortunately Mike and Angela are the only one's who will talk to me. Angela is great but Mike... is just gross. Maybe I will call Angela later or in the morning. Now I could go to the movies with her. Shit she could even bring Ben. He is too funny and they'd be a good distraction.

Angela always says, "Bella don't worry you will heal in time."

I believe her I do but jeez it's been almost three years and I gotta go to work. Until later.　

Okay I know I usually don't write twice in a day and never 3 times but I feel as if I am being watched. I can't explain it. If I say anything to Charlie he might flip out. I'd have the whole police force of Forks, Washington following me every day. Ugh! Can you truly go bonkers from stress?

I feel like I am cracking up.

_"Well that's because you are."_

I have no one I can tell but you. Dear Journal where would I be with out you? The nuthouse that's where. Well gotta rest tomorrow will be busy. I have to work with Mike all frigging day. I despise him but I need the money. Until later.　

**Chapter Notes: Okay so I am not a Mike fan..sorry. He is just yuck!! Tell me what'cha think??? Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button :) **


	6. Chapter 5: Cowboys are FUN!

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL **

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them. **

*****Thank you for the reviews and staying with me here. *****

****** Story recs for today-- Bridge over troubled Water and Not meant to be Broken by IwantawerewolfForMyself *** They are super, they are team Emmett and so worth it!!!!!!******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 5 (Cowboy's are FUN)**

Dear Journal,

Okay last night did not disappoint. The dream was weird at first but the more I think about it the hotter it is to relive in my head. I seriously need an evaluation. I wonder if the mental health facility in Port Angeles has any openings? Anyhow on to the good stuff. This was just so ordinary of a thing it's almost comical.

I walked in the kitchen carrying two heavy bags when I heard Jasper call me from upstairs.

"Bella?"

"Yes baby."

"When you are done I need your help up here with something, please."

"Okay."

I put away the milk and eggs; the rest can wait until later. I walked up to my room. I stopped in the doorway; there was a cowboy hat on the end of the bed, but no sign of Jasper.

"Put it on," he said from behind me.

"What?"

I tried to turn to look at him but he stopped me. "Please put it on and take off your clothes. Don't turn around and I'll be back in one minute." He kissed the back of my neck and was gone.

"Um, okay." I giggled.

When he returned he pressed himself into my back. I could feel just how happy he was to see me.

"Jasper, what are you doing?"

"I am trying to make my girl happy."

"I love you, you always make me happy," I said with a smile.

"Darlin' work with me here, okay."

"Okay fine, I giggled. "What do you want me to do now?"

"I want you to turn slowly and kiss me."

His voice was husky with the need to be with me. I turned around to look at him and Holy Shit! He was wearing a pair of brown leather chaps, a cowboy hat, boots and nothing else.

_**Dear Jesus take me now. I am truly in a happy place. **_My thoughts were everywhere. Oh how I wished this was not a dream.

"Well howdy partner. Are you happy to see me?" I said with a big smile on my face.

I leaned into kiss him. He reached around my back and pressed me close to him. He ordered me on the bed.

"Bed now!" he growled. _God that's sexy._

I nodded and obeyed. He pressed his lips to my ankles and worked his way up to my thighs. I started moaning to let him know I was enjoying his tongue working over my body.

He kissed up to my center and gently entered his fingers into me and licked my opening. He pressed hard against my clit. I started screaming with delight as I came.

He moved up my body to my stomach, to my breasts. He kissed up and down my body. He looked up as if asking for my permission – "Oh God Yes Please" - I screamed.

He gently pulled himself on top of me and entered my center. He moved slowly at first and then sped up. He flipped me over with out breaking our connection and I was straddling him.

"Ride me cowgirl, please!"

"Oh dear sir, you are going to pay for this," I said smiling.

He looked up at me with a smirk and said, "Bring it on baby. I think I can handle it!"

"Cocky fucker, aren't ya?" I said.,

I started to grind into him and he grabbed my hips and slammed into me, we both groaned in delight. His hips were meeting mine and as I felt my muscles start to tighten I felt him shoot into me. I collapsed onto his chest.

Gasping for air, I whispered, "Thank you."

"No darlin' the pleasure was all mine."

He leaned his head over and kissed me. He turned us onto our sides and looked into my eyes and said, "So what's for dinner?"

I sat up in the bed blinking. It was as if I could actually feel him with me. I truly can't explain it but I am hoping this is a means for my mind to fix itself. I am tired of being alone and depressed. Until later.

**Chapter Notes: ****Blushing**** Did you like that image or what? Yip Ky Yay as my beta Jenna would say!!!! What did you think? Was it worth it???? Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know :) **


	7. Chapter 6: Grow up Swan!

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them.**

****** Story recs for today-- The Cullen Family Camping Trip I & II by LeesaM--They are truly hysterical. Emmett... the things he gets into.... with his craziness and poor Bells is along for the ride... But I have to post a warning with them...DO NOT EAT or DRINK while reading! You will choke! LOL ******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 6 (Grow up Swan!)**

Dear Journal,

I woke up in a much better mood this morning. I think I have pre-pms or something. My hormones, something, is messing with my mind. If I did not know better I'd say someone was watching me. Creepy I know but I am not sure. Jake and the boys are always out so I am home alone. I don't do so well when I am alone.

Damn, tomorrow is my 21st birthday. I so hate birthdays. I wish Jasper was here so I could tell him this is not his fault.

"Jasper this is not your fault!"

I'd shout it from the top of the world if it would bring them back. I should have been more careful. I am a fucking idiot who got a paper cut... a fucking paper cut of all things and it's only natural.

"Edward you are a dumb ass for pushing me into a table with glass on it. This is all your fault!"

As I write my anger is mounting. Edward is such a coward. How could he do this to me, to him, to his family? My promise to myself is I am not going to cry I have cried enough over the past three years. Who am I kidding?

I am getting desperate. I tried all their cell phone numbers, again, still disconnected. What was I thinking? Dumb ass they'll not reconnect a number just so you can talk to them.

"What? Are you stupid?"

"Why yes self I am, we both are."

We are waiting for a coven of VAMPIRES to return.

"They don't want us!!!"

"Grow up Bella Swan!!!"

"Just fucking grow up!!!"

"Tomorrow you will be a legal woman. The drinks are on me. We will visit Jose, Jack, Jim and maybe a little Captain Morgan. Why not? You are only 21 once, right? Maybe I can drink myself into forgetting them. Can you do that?"

Crap! Crap! Crap! Why do I do this to myself? Good night. I so need to dream with Jasper or Emmett tonight! Ugh... thought.... I have to work all day again with Mike!

Talk about a fucked up birthday!

"Well self what do you think of that?"

"Huh?"

"What no comment?"

Okay enough yelling at myself. Going to be now. Until Later.

*****Thank you for the reviews ... I have to give a special shout out to my girl Shelby (UltimateKCLFan), your revies an PM's make my day :) Srsly!!! I love'em!!!!**

**Chapter Notes: Okay so I am anxious what did you think? Is Bella nuts or what??? Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know:) **


	8. Chapter 7: Day Dreams

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL **

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them. **

****** Story recs**** for today-- Breathe Me by afragilelittlehuman---It's a cross****-over with Moonlight and it is sparklicious and awesome!!!!**** **

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 7 (Day dreams)**

Dear Journal,

Okay, so I have hit a new level of absolute horror...you know as in day dreaming at work.... lol. The only plus side was the look on Mike's face when he got my attention.

"Bella, what in the hell is wrong with you?"

_Well douche bag where do I begin? I am ... lonely, sex deprived, lonely and did I mention sex deprived??? _

"Relax dude I'm fine. Just thinking."

_And what a thought..._

Then the frustration hit me. Can your body actually explode? I think mine might! I am so going to need therapy but here how today played out.

I was at work and as usual Mike was yammering on about who know what, when this very sexy guy came in. Tall, dark and totally fuckable. All my view gave me was his back... what an ass? Jesus he was sex on legs for sure. It makes me cum just to think about it. Okay so I am super excited and rambling... on with it Swan.

When I got myself together, I rushed over to offer my assistance and then all hell broke loose. He turned and gave me a dimpled smile...

"Emmett?"

"Bells, baby how in the hell are ya'?"

I was so struck by him I thought I had died and gone to heaven.

"I, um, Emmett?" I was babbling like a damn fool and had no idea what was going on around me. I centered around him and it was so freaking fuckawesome.

He smiled and grabbed my hand. Then I was being pushed into the counter of the store. I looked around nervously, no one here, great! His lips were on mine and I loved it. He was demanding my body do his bidding. I was willingly giving in.

He slid me on the counter and looked at me with those golden eyes again before pulling my pants off. It happened so quick I had no time to miss them. He kissed down my neck, across my shoulder and back to my lips.

"Bella," he whispers, "I want you."

"Yes, now please." I sighed.

He slowly moves himself in place after removing his pants. He smiles and slides ever so gently into me. My hips start to buck and it feels like my whole body is on fire. Burn, baby, burn. I could care less, he felt so good in me I just don't care.

He quickened his pace and I was starting to feel the muscles in me tighten, my breath hitched and he pulled out. Pausing for a second I was about to scream at him to move when he slammed into me. The things he was doing to me were crazy. He pushed and pushed until my body exploded around him.

He reaches out and takes my hand, pulling me from my love counter. I sighed and he looked so hurt. He slowly pulled me to his chest and kissed me gently.

That's when sir, I have to be all in everyones' business interrupted us... listen to me like it was real. I tell you these dreams are making me nuts, but I hope they last forever. At least I feel connected to them this way.

**Chapter Notes:** *****Thank you for the reviews and staying with me here. I am super excited about this fic. I appreciate you all******* MoreEmmett!!! YAY!!!! **

**Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know :) **


	9. Chapter 8: Crazy Much?

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! ****Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL **

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them. **

****** Story recs for today.....A Lesson In Release, A Lesson in Fate, A Lesson in Love a trilogy by Lillie Cullen. Team Jasper and Team Edward. Very Good!!!! ******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 8 (Crazy Much?)**

Dear Journal,

It's with saddened emotions that I am writing today. Tomorrow is the 3rd anniversary of my life ending? My birthday was a couple days ago and I can't handle the emotions that have been running through me over the last few years.

The last week has been the worst. I can't bring myself to write everyday since I am so overwhelmed. I wish they'd come back. I miss my family. I just can't handle the thoughts of being alone and never finding love again.

I am unable to talk to my friends. I am sure they all hate me. I hate myself most days. the whole in my chest makes me feel like I'm being torn apart. I just can't begin to understand why they left. So I am human. Who gives a shit? I mean really. They are vampires.

"Whoopty fuckin' dooda!"

I found out my best friend turns into a big very creepy looking wolf a year ago. I didn't leave when he tried to tell me to avoid him. I am not a scared little chicken shit. I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe I am about to flip. Charlie will have to have me committed. I can see the doctor's now...

"Ms. Swan, can you tell us what's wrong?"

"Sure my ex-boyfriend and his family are a coven of vampires. They left me here, unprotected and alone. They don't love me."

Yeah that would be an easy conversation. I'd be in a padded cell so fast I'd get dizzy.

I just don't know what to do. I am debating on going off to Seattle or somewhere further away. Maybe if I get out of this little town and surround myself with people who will not pity me all the time I can figure out what I am doing. I could always go to Dartmouth.

I was accepted but I refuse to go when Charlie was pushing me into getting away. I knew they'd never come back but a small part of me has always hoped and prayed. I feel like such a freak. A failure. A mess.

To top it all off I have to work with the asshat, all fucking daylong! I so wish he'd call in sick tomorrow. I'd rather work all day with a llama than have to deal with him. Vile little turd.

Well I have to go to sleep now. It apparently is my only way to be close to one of them at least. I miss dreaming about Emmett but I so look forward to my dreams about Jasper. I at least feel something even if it doesn't last long. Good night.

**Chapter Notes: Okay again Mike bashing is what I do. LOL So what did you think? Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know:) **


	10. Chapter 9: Don't Leave Me

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL **

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. (Check out her Jasper/Bella fics- Crimson Guilt and it's sequel Search for Redemption) I promise you will love them. **

******Story rec for today....A dose of Emmett by Funkymunky2511. Very Good and totally worth it!! Gotta love a little Emm..******

**Long A/N Srsly Sorry!**

**Chapter 10 (Don't leave Me)**

Dear Journal,

Happy end of your life Ms. Swan!! Let's have a fucking party!!

It's been three years to the day since Edward left me in the woods. Well Charlie and I call it the incident. Well, I am officially ready to start the day from hell. I have to see Mike's sour face all day. Great. Laterz.

Okay I know, a second entry but fuck me yesterday was so not what I expected! I was at Newton's listening to Mike yammer on about meaningless shit. We had been swamped and finally had a minute for a breather. I heard a husky southern voice from behind me.

I of course flipped the fuck out and totally thought I was loosing it. I so thought Jasper was a dream. I haven't been writing but I think I am better. The stress and anxiety I was feeling is somehow gone. I know Jasper is back and he's not leaving me again. He promised! I even made him cross his heart. I wish you could have seen the look on his face. Priceless.

Our conversation was abnormal one but I was shocked at some of the answers I got to my questions. Before we talked we promised each other we'd answer any question no matter how hard it was.

"Jasper, please don't leave me again. I really would die. I can't take the pain again."

"Bella, darlin' I am here to stay. I promise."

"Why did you come back? I mean, why now?"

"Alice had a vision a year ago and well," he trailed off.

He was making me nervous.

"Jasper, what happened?"

"She saw her and Edward together. They were each other's true destiny."

All I could do was sit there like an idiot and blink. The silent tears started falling and there was no stopping them. Jasper reached over and wiped them off with his thumb and leaned in and kissed my forehead.

"Bella don't cry. I have accepted it. Because during that same vision, she saw... she saw me and... you together."

I jumped up and started pacing my room. Good thing Charlie was working night shift. The more I let that set in the madder I got.

"What in the hell! Why didn't she see it earlier? She could have saved us both so much hurt!"

"Bella, darlin' calm down."

"Jasper stop fucking with my emotions! Let me feel this. I need to do this myself!"

All of a sudden it hit me. I fell to my knees and a feeling of happiness hit me. Not from Jasper but from inside me. All the torment, pain and suffering had led me to Jasper. But why?

"Bella, stop worrying. We will be fine. I have Alice's promise on that."

"Jasper how can you be okay with this? I mean I am grateful but, how?"

"Bella I trust Alice. Remember we have never bet against her and I will not start now."

He moved to kneel in front of me and I kissed him. It shocked us both but he actually kissed me back. Then he pulled me into his lap. I must have fallen asleep because now I am writing and looking up at the most beautiful creature ever. It's as if my heart has started healing and I am grateful. I can't wait to see what happens next in this thing we call life. 　

**Chapter Notes: **Giggles** YAY!!!! Love it... Hate it??? Hit the green button and let me know :) **


	11. Epilogue: A Happily Ever After

**A/N: This is my first attempt at a full length fic. I hope you enjoy it. This is dedicated to all of my TEAM JASPER Girls!!! Rated M for language and Lemons. If you do not like lemons please do not read! **

**Disclaimer: Sadly I own nothing. All things Twilight belong to SM. But I wish I did own Jasper and Emmett… Think of the fun we could have. -Evil Grin- LOL The song mentioned belongs to its prospective owner.**

**Special Thanks to my wonderful and helpful BETA Jenna822. She put so much into making this great!!! You rock girly!!! I couldn't have done it without you!!!**

******Story rec for today. I have found a story called 'Saving Bella' by mynxi, ya'll it is awesome!! it is a J/B set after the Birthday chaos. It has made me angyr, made me cry and it is just great... Check it out******

**Epilogue: **

Today is my 22nd birthday. I will have no more after this one. Since Jasper's return a year ago we have come full circle. I am beyond happy and I really think we can move on from the crap that was my life and be happy. Together. I still can't believe he is here with me. Smiling and laughing with me.

Hell even Charlie is okay with it. The first introductions were interesting but at least Charlie didn't try to shoot him. Carlisle will be close by to monitor me just in case anything goes wrong. The whole family came back a few months after Jasper did. I am glad we have all been able to reconnect. I was upset at first but I just had to grow up and suck it up.

Today we will become Mr. & Mrs. Jasper Whitlock.

Jasper is my future so I am no longer dwelling on the past. I was so shocked at Charlie today. My father, Mr. I show no emotions actually cried. Of course he tried to hide it but I caught him. It was fan fucking tastic!

"Dad are you ready?" I asked as I walked over to the door.

"Oh Bells!" He grabbed me into a tight embrace and I was sure he'd suffocate me if I weren't careful.

"Umm dad..."

"Oh sorry Bells.... you... look so... fantastic," he was crying so each word was pronounced by itself.

"Dad I love you and always will. Don't worry Jasper is going to take good care of me."

"I know Bells, but you are my baby, I love you!"

"Okay you two. Are you ready?" Alice came bouncing over to us and kissed us each on the cheek.

"I think so," we whispered.

"Alice thank you so much for getting this all together for us. I love you and I know Jasper does too."

"Oh Bella it was my pleasure. Now come on its time for you to become Mrs. Jasper Whitlock." She was smiling so big, who was I to argue. I could not wait to see him.

Then there he was in a black tux. It's a good thing Charlie was there; I don't think my legs would have held me up by themselves. Jasper had his friend/brother from Texas, Peter, officiate our ceremony.

We pledged our love for each other in front of God, our family and our friends. The platinum wedding bands were exchanged with smiles and tears. After the ceremony we made our way to the dance floor. I could see him nod his head and the song started. Alison Krauss When You Say Nothing At All... the tears started and I could not hold them back.

_It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart  
Without saying a word you can light up the dark  
Try as I may I could never explain  
What I hear when you don't say a thing_

_  
__The smile on your face lets me know that you need me_

"Bella, I love you, darlin'. How did I ever get so lucky?"

_There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me_

"Jasper, I am the lucky one. I love you more that you will ever know. You're my other half, forever."

_  
__The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

All day long I can hear people talking out loud

_  
_"Mrs. Whitlock, you look like a vision in white. I can't wait til I get you out of this dress."

_But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd  
Old Mr. Webster could never define_

"Why Mr. Whitlock, are you trying to seduce your wife?"

_  
__What's being said between your heart and mine_

"Yes ma'am I am?

_  
__The smile on your face lets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me_

"I think I like it. Maybe I can't wait to get you out of that tuxedo." I said as I nipped at his bottom lip.

_The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

He growled in response. I could feel my cheeks burning with a blush with the thoughts of what I would do to him before he changed me and then after.

_The smile on your face lets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me_

_The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever i fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

The tears I shed today were of pure joy. I get to keep this man as mine for the rest of my life and no one can take him from me. All in all it was a great day. I danced with Charlie, Edward, Emmett and Carlisle. I got back to Jasper and then the day was over.

"Bella, time to change so you guys can go."

"Alice," I growled.

"Can't it wait a few more minutes? I am trying to enjoy a moment with my husband here."

"Oh you'll have forever, let's go."

I got changed and said my final goodbyes. I am beyond happy and glad today is the start of forever. I will never regret this decision.

He will not tell me where we are going but I love him more than my own life. I'd go anywhere with him. He is my…. everything and I am very excited in spending eternity with him. I wanted to write these last thoughts down on the way just to help me after the transition. So until later.

**Author/Chapter Note: ********Thank you all for reading and encouraging me. ;) there aren't words to tell you how happy I am with ya'll for reading.**** LOL Srsly. This last chap actually was written with tears. I hope you enjoyed it. *******

***** Check out my other stories on my profile page... Unknown Saviors it's a Jasper/Bella full of drama and some serious Mike bashing, LOL*** **

**Hit the green button and let me know if you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it :) **


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